Thats not OK to say....

I think that some people at my work place could use some sensitivity training, particular the older folks, who (hopefully) come from a different place or time.

I was in the office yesterday afternoon overseeing the delivery of a giant crap load of documents that I scurried home with to use for my own evil purposes. Below is the conversation between me and Older Office Lady (OOL)

OOL: What a polite young man (refering to the delivery person).

Me: Yes, he seems nice.

OOL: And what nice speech for a black person!

Me: ummm..... excuse me?

OOL: Well, you know how they usually talk, this one talks like a proper white person.

Me: Umm.... :::walking away:::

Fellow office slaves.... just because you're white and I am white doesn't mean we're "in this together", don't poke me and make rude racial/religous/ect comments. Not only can that get you in trouble, its also extremely rude, outdated, and just plain shitty. Below, please enjoy other gems:

OOL: WOW.... That one speaks english, they never bother to do that.

Mailroom ass: (refering to the spanish cleaning lady asking to use our restroom) Hahahaha maybe if she was white!

Random Fileroom Girl: (refering to a new hire who is :::gasp::: black) Well at least he's not like his "brothers" and probably won't rob us.

Excuse me people???? We are at WORK, please be a racist asshole on your own time. Theres nothing wrong with black, hispanic, white, albanian, gay, old, young, etc people. They are shitty people of all varieties, we are not in a "secret club of white", because let me let you in on a secret, I don't believe the Klan will let me joing since I am Jewish. Though seriously, we're not working at the white nationalist foundation, maybe you need to get your resume to them?

Thanks for hearing the rant :)

First Year-

Side not to a poster (who I deleted, congradulations it's the first) named "second year" who apparently just made a blogger acount to be an asshole to me. Fuck you, what kind of asshole would respond to my previous post by telling me I deserved for my boyfriend to almost fucking die? Sorry, no matter what I did/didn't do (its a blog btw) to insinuate that I brought this on this or that it was payback for my actions is truly disgusting. Go fuck yourself. You are a fucking coward.

ETA: No second year, a coward is not just someone who says nothing, it also includes someone like you who makes up an account simply to harass someone, without any possibility of repercussion. Send me an email and we can discuss, keep off of my blog. (firstyearorlast@gmail.com)
Sorry for the rest of you, it just made me furious.

Something Sad

So, I have some not so great "big" news, I am not going back to school this fall, I am defferring my enrollment until the spring semester. Mr. First Year was extremely ill about a month ago, has not yet returned to work, so I cannot afford to be a student and still pay rent and eat.

I am really pretty depressed and down about the decision. I know its not the end of the world, but at the moment it really feels as if it might be.

So, I will try to write about something legally minded during my hiatus from school, but in reality this blog will probably include more accounting/life stories.

Please, no nasty comments this is really hard on me to begin with.

Thanks :(

First Year-

Its my Blogging Birthday!!!

Someone pointed out to me via email that I have almost been blogging for an entire year! August 23, 2005 was my first post, and here it is....August 2006. WOW, I really didn't know if I could keep this up for a year, but apparently I can.

I don't know if enough people read this to do this, but I have seen it done so I decided to give it a try.

Does anyone have a favorite few posts? I would love to know what you all (ya'll) enjoy reading.

Anything you wish I would post about?

Well.... Aside from that, please to enjoy my favorite incompetence encounter yesterday.

Setting: Macy's in Tysons Corner VA check out register.

Me: Getting about $200 worth of things rung up

Macy's Clerk (MC, because Macy's Employee, I just realized in ME, too confusing!): Apparently short on credit card application.

MC: Would you like to apply for a Macy's card and save 10%?

Me: No thanks, I already have a Macy's card, I would prefer to pay with my Visa.

MC: But if you sign up for a Macy's card you'll save $23 today!

Me: Thats OK, I already have a card :::beggining to swipe my Visa Debit Card::::

MC: Why wouldn't you want to save money? Just sign up for a Macy's card and you can save some money!

Me: I told you, I already have a card :::pulls out Macy's card from wallet and show clerk:::: so I *cannot* sign up for a new one, please let me ring through my card.

MC: Well, you can certainly pay however you like, but as I told you if you sign up for a Macy's card you will save $23, but apparently you don't like to save money, :::pulls out card application:::, now just fill this out and you'll be on your way.

Me: ARRRGHHH

Dear store clerks,

I understand how you feel. I worked in Sears in High School, we had to ask people that question. But if someone doesn't want one they don't want one. On top of which, you can only have one. If someone not only tells you they already have one but also shows it to you, please just press the magic button on your register to authorize my "real" credit card.

First Year (who picked all her crap and walked across the store to another register)

HaHa Blogger....I win :) Guess where I was! :)

I Cannot Work The Computer.....

Well, I *thought* I made a fairly long post yesterday, complete with pictures, but it seems the blogger monster has eaten it.

So, as a second attempt, here a few photos of my "desitination" this past weekend. Guess where I was :) (or don't, I can't tell you what to do!)

OK....thats it I hate blogger. I have uploaded my images like 8 times, with then not showing up.

So, no photos :( And now I have to run back to "work"

Hope you all enjoy your day!

General Rudeness

I have been noticing lately that people seem to have gotten significantly ruder to me/around me. Now, of course I know rude people exist and always have and will, but I would never have thought grown men and women (professionals at that) would act like an untrained child when let loose in public in the ways I have seen. Below, a few choice examples :)

1. Sunday at the Grocery Store I was purchasing some live lobsters for a lobster bake I was having in my backyard to celebrate the purchase of a huge new grill. I was first in line at the butcher/fish monger and asked for 6 live lobsters. As I was handed the live creatures the women behind me says, "ewww.... those are still alive, you're going to have to kill them to eat them, don't you know they scream when you kill them?" I was a bit shocked at her obvious lack of social skills, and as she was picking out her steak for supper I said, "Yea, because I am sure the cow you're about to eat definetly didn't scream when it was slaughtered."

Yes I was rude as well, but I am not so great at keeping my mouth shut, and damnit I am from new england and I love me my seafood! She then proceeded to follow me to the veggie/fruit section and as I was picking out lemon and corn berate me for insuating that the cow she was going to eat suffered or scream, "I am not a killer like you, I could neeeever kill an animal." and other such obnoxious comments. I of course, told her that the cow was most certainly killed for her sake, and that at least I didn't need someone else to kill my food for me to feel OK about eating it, and at least I knew the lobster would die in a human way, unlike the cow she was planning on eating. She of course continued to follow me to the checkout line and tell the people around me how horrible and cruel I was, "she's going to kill that lobster when she gets home, it's alive right now and she doesn't care!".

Listen lady, this behavior would be rude but understandable from a vegetarian, but you ma'am are eating bloody steak for dinner. Get off your high horse, please!

2. Last week I found myself running into DC to pick up some documents and the such from a property. I parked across the street and was waiting for the walk light to cross "L" street. As the light signaled for me to walk a business man stepped up behind me, used his entire arm to push me back and propell himself forward. I almost fell off of my 4 inch stileto heels and unto the floor. A kind man behind me grabbed my other arm so I stayed upright (I thanked you then, but thank you again!). The man who pushed me didn't even blink and kept walking. I wanted to catch up with him and elbow him in the kidneys before stepping unto the other sidewalk, but realized there was no way to do this in a ladylike and graceful way. So...to you sir, what the fuck is your problem? You cannot just push a stranger to get ahead a few steps. I almost fell down! I am a young women wearing high heels, a skirt suit, and rushing just like you....who the fuck does that?

3. I am a smoker (cigerettes), I know its bad (spare me the lecture), and I do my best to not smoke around those who don't (if I am sitting in none smoking I don't smoke, if I am at an outdoor event and near a bunch of none smokers I dont smoke, etc). However, when I am seated in a smoking area, I will in fact smoke if I feel like it. A few weeks back me and a few girlfriends were having a girls night at a favorite restuarant. The smoking section is of course near the bar, with tables and booths around it. We were all smokers and were having a cigerette with our drinks before we ordered dinner. There quite a wait at the place, and I know some people put down "first available" because its often faster that way, and more likely then not more people want non-smoking then smooking. However, when this family of 6 (2 adults 4 children) sat down in the booth next to us, glared and announced to the hostest, "they are going to have to stop smoking, we have children!" I was pretty surprise. We all moved our cigerettes to minimize the smoke carry over to their table, but didn't put them out. A few seconds later Momma Bear appeared at our table, "Since the hostest won't make you stop smoking I am going to have to. Can't you see we have children with us? What kind of person wants to poison their lungs. You're going to have to put those out, we cannot enjoy a meal when we can smell your nasty smoke.".

One of my friends just burst out laughin, and stated plainly, "this is the smoking section, you should move to non-smoking if you don't want to be around smoke." no apology needed, we're sitting where we should. Nope, Mama Bear disagreed, "theres a huge wait, we HAD to sit here to eat faster, don't yoy see our kids???? They cannot wait an hour for dinner, they're hungry. Now put those out and we can all enjoy our night."

Needless to say, we continued to smoke whenever the mood struck, as we were there for a long time, enjoying a looong meal and lots and lots of drinks. Mom, Dad and brats (no, not all kids are brats, kids who kick the booth, run around, throw things, and scream are brats) continued to demand we stop smoking, friend continued to tell them to move, and the waitstaff was miserable. Everytime our (very nice) server was at their table, "tell them to stop smoking, that is so rude, doesn't this restuarant care about it's customers?" to which the reply was the same, "I am sorry Ma'am this is the smoking section, I cannot tell them to stop. Would you like to be moved to non-smoking when a table opens?".

I have to ask, who was the rude one here?

Anyhow, I fear this post has gotten long, so many people this will be volume 1. Anyone else have a rude story to tell?

:) First Year-

The Lonely Life of an Auditor

So, this is day 2 of my long overdue cycle at auditing our properties. Basically I drive to the property, pick up a giant staff of crap mainly relating to numbers (oh the numbers, how I longed to break free of you once entering law school, but it was not to be) and take them home to fuck with them and see if they are the same numbers I have back at the office.

I could go to the office to do this task, but CFO was nice enough to tell me I could stay home and do it. Well.... now I am lonely and bored at home, feel shut out from the outside world and feel a bit like a pariah at the properties, as they announce my arrival with "The auditor is here!".

You would think this was ideal, and I have worked entirely from home before, so I am used to it. But something about the summer, the close availablity of the pool, my vegetable garden full of ripe fruit and erratic weeds makes me fuck around all day only to realize the 9 hours of work I had to do has seeminly been forgotten.

So, I end up on the couch with my computer, the pile of numbers, my best friend (Quick Books Enterprise Edition) and a beer (well maybe like 7 beers) watching wife swap and hells kitchen.

As you can imagine, the auditing is coming along very well (well thats what I tell CFO).

I seriously need to get out of the house, too bad I have both todays and half of yesterday's work to do before I am allowed out to be free with the rest of society.

First Year (the shut in)

I am a Starbucks Whore

Well... what can I say? I wanted to hate Starbucks, at first I resisted. I mean, 5 bucks for some coffee? Naaah I'm not a yuppie, I would never do that! Well... 2 years later I have quite the Starbucks habit. Now that I work somewhere with a Starbucks IN (yes in!) the building I cannot resist, and every day I feed the Starbucks machine. I have to say, I do love the people who work at my Starbucks, they're quick, friendly, helpful, etc.

So when this conversation took place Friday I felt a little....shall we say whorish?

Me (idlying chatting with bored Manager): I am going to miss these Moca's next week, I wont be in the office.

Starbucks Manager (SM): Really? Whats going on?

Me: Oh....just doing some internal audits at some properties.

SM: That stinks, well there'll be another starbucks, its not like you're loyal or anything, you'll just move on to another one.

Me: Um.... I guess I probably will get my coffee at another one.

SM: Of course you will, you NEED the Mocha, and you don't care one bit about where you get it from!

Me: I guess that makes me a Starbucks whore, I'll get it where I can.

Me and SM: laugh our asses off.

So, I am a whore for my Mocha, what can I say?

:)

Dinner with the Frosty Bitch

I can think of many enjoyable ways to spend an evening, none of these methods include the General Counsel (aka Frosty Bitch, please see part 1 of the credit card saga) and eating a meal with her or spending any significant amount of time trapped with her. But alas, when the general counsel invites you and your significant other out to dinner with herself and her husband you tend to feel obliged to go. So go we did, to a great steak house in Tyson’s Corner that I have frequently passed by but have never visited.

To begin, you should know that I really hate this woman. She was a horrible bitch to work for and now she is just a horrible bitch to work around. So below please find some bulleted highlights of the evening (because I know attention spans are getting shorter :)

- FB, your husband is a professional (an architect I believe?) and I am sure (no really sure, I have seen your American Express bill!) that you two regularly dine at finer establishments, the steakhouse was no exception. A side salad was $12, which should give you a hint that jeans, a ratty sports cab and sneakers are not OK. Wasn’t he a bit embarrassed when asked if he would like to borrow a jacket? Well we were thanks!

- Honey Mustard????? Really? Did you see the choice of dressing, some really great things, very creative, specially crafted to go with the salad, but no….you ask if there was any “Honey Mustard”. Our tired server practically laughed when she told you, no there was none. Most people would have let it go, but not you take this as a personal affront. (“What, that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard…. I can’t believe this….. what kind of place is this??”) FB….. It’s the type of place where kids and adults who have hissy fits over a dressing are not welcome.

- I am not a parent, but if I were I imagine that during a night out I might want to call my home to make sure that the children are all safe and the such. Don’t you think the best place for said conversation is away from the dinner table? Aside from the rudeness of making a cell phone call in a quiet restaurant was the fact that you were screaming and discussing your little one’s stomach troubles. Eww…..look around you, we’re *eating*….go talk near the entrance, at the bar, in the restroom, or anywhere else. Also, continuing to shovel food into your face while chatting was a great classy touch!

- The best was definitely saved for last. When it was time to pay the bill your deviant/husband reached for the bill. Instead allowing him to for once wear the pants, you start reminding him of ways the server slighted you and should get less tip. There was the honey mustard (yea… she was definitely the one that decided not to stock it, or maybe she knew you wanted it so badly she decided to not order this week). Then there was the time that we ate the bread but the basket remained, empty and unneeded for several minutes (the audacity of her). But of course the best was the fact that she didn’t appear to have many tables and “wasn’t even that busy or working very hard” (yea….what a freaking slacker, only 3 tables in her section and she appeared calm and under control, I really love to see people work for it too….). Just get this through your head, you’re a cheap awful bitch and have NO appreciation for anyone working hard at all. You didn’t appreciate me when I worked for you, you torment your new assistant, and for god sakes, you had a great meal and want to nitpick whether some sever was working hard enough or not.
So, thanks for dinner. We do appreciate you picking the tab up. You’d have a fit if you knew before we walked out the door Boyfriend gave the waitress a $50, because god knows what you left, she had to put up with your idiocy, and we had a great meal. Now…choke on it J

Sincerely,

FY-