Friday, March 14, 2008

Why I Hate Salespeople

I know that sales is a job just like any other, and we actually NEED them here to sell our product, do demos, negotiate contracts and the such. But really do these folks have to be such total douche bags.

In an attempt to be a good employee I always answer their emails, give them the info that they ask for (even if they could easily get it themselves), and so on. But at this point, it really takes up a lot of my time, time that should be spend actually doing the work I was hired for. On top of that, I begin to get a little more and more bitter at all of the perks they recieve, while seemingly doing so much less work.

It started when they had their annual sales conference in a location on a the beach, where they and their spouses recieved airfare, hotel, food, activities, golf, and so on for a week to attend this meeting. The rest of us got to be back here, in frigid ass semi-frozen tundra that was the DC metro area.

Next they were given a cruise for free, also with flights, food, transfers, activities included, also with their mates attending. This was not a meeting, so they could not even play it like they were working. The bitterness definitely grew, this was after they;d only been back in the office a week. I haven't had a vacation in I dont even know how long, but here they get 2 free on the company while we don't so much as get the day before Christmas off. Real nice, a great way to build team spirit. And yes I know I am being childish and petty, if I were a saleperson I would get it too, but I am not so I don't.

Now in view all of these perks they get over me I really start to find myself feeling less and less chartible towards them and my will to want to help them when I don't technically have to and they could do it themselves really has faded to basically nothing.

There are 2 here that I actually like as human beings, and they never ask me for anything if they can do it themselves, they do their own work because in the end I wont be getting a penny of their commision, or a flight to Florida for anything I do. I'll just get my paycheck (which really is good enough for me, I just dont need these other perks flaunted in my face thank you very much). The others, I wouldn't care if they left yesterday. Here is a brief list of why I hate our salespeople.

1. They did not take to heart that saying that "A lack of planning on your part does not equal an emergency on my part". So, a few weeks back when a salesman ran up to me 5 minutes before quitting time demanding I pull all sorts of information for him because he had a dinner meeting and needed it to give to the client, I was none to sympathetic.

"How long ago did you plan this meeting?" I asked.

"About a week back" says the out of breath salesman.

"Well you should have put your request in them, I am going home at its xx:xx o'clock, so I wont be able to help you until tomorrow, You can get x info and x info by yourself, the rest your regional manager can pull for you"

"But....I can't ask him, its too close to the meeting, can't you just do this for me?"

"Sorry I've got plans, I am out for the day, I'll see you tomorrow" as I put my coat on, turn off my computer and gather my belongings.

I didn't actually have plans, I am just a bitch. I wont be staying an hour late because this asshole didn't ask me for something in time and now doesn't want to ask his manager because he'll get in trouble. Seriously, you want to make an upsell YOU work for it, I dont get a penny extra for going out of my way to help you out. So now, I sure did enjoy sitting on the couch watching TMZ while you must have been getting reamed out for waiting until the last minute.

2.Blatant rudeness. Now, these folks have to be people people because they manage to sell stuff to other people right? Why then is it that they cannot say a simple Please and a Thank You? When you do something for them?

It drives me up a people are not my supervisors or bosses in anyway so would it kill you to change, "Get me this now!!!!" and than snatching it from me and walking off with a grunt to "I am in a tight spot, could you please pull this for me?.... Oh thank you so much!"

My working theory is that these guys are total douche bags and they spend so much time surpressing their horrible personalities to make nice nice with the clients that they simply cannot restrain their natural asshole any longer.

3. FUCKING RESPOND TO EMAIL....thats right email. When I send you an email asking for a client contact or something only you would know, actually answer me back. You'd have a total heart attack if I didn't answer you back in 30 minutes, so why is it that I have to send you reminder after reminder to get you to give me one phone number or email address. Are you that busy and important? I really don't think so.

Ahhh this makes me appreciate the 2 good ones so much more.

No Love-

First Year-


Blogger Capitol Hill 20210 said...

Great blog, enjoyed reading it.

12:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just had to post a comment because I came upon this site after doing a search for "I hate salespeople". And after reading this, you must work at my company. Or these's some place that just clones these people and sends them out to work. I wish I could be a bitch when they ask me for things last minute. I used to be, then they started complaining to their manager that I wasn't being a team player and now I have to do everything they ask as soon as they ask or I'm in danger of being fired. :)

And the lack of e-mail response section was dead on as well.

Great, isn't it?

7:08 AM  

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