Monday, November 06, 2006

People You Meet at Work: God Lady

I don’t know about you folks but almost every place I have worked that was reasonably large had at least one person, always a woman, who loves Jesus. She loves him A LOT, not the normal religious type of love, but the type of deep sitting obsession that permeates into everything they say and do. You know the type, they just cannot shut up about Jesus, the dying on the cross bit, the sacrificing for the sins, and on and on.

Of course my current gig is no different and I have the extreme pleasure of getting to work closely with this woman, as she is the manager of a department I must work closely with. At first things with God Lady (“GL”) started out nicely enough, but quickly the mention of religion, Jesus, heaven and hell got to be simply too much for me.

So, the next time GL was in my office I casually mentioned being made uncomfortable by all the Jesus-talk and she flipped out. “The only reason someone doesn’t want to hear about and talk about the Lord is because they haven’t accepted him heart and soul.”

So, I informed GL that not only was I not Christian (I am a Jew…go figure, a Jewish accountant and soon to be lawyer) that I and simply not religious at all. Well she flipped, apparently she didn’t want my Jew soul to rot in hell ( that’s so sweet) so she made it her mission to show me Jesus in everyday life, and the “Miracles that he creates all around us”.

Miracle 1: “The Magic of the Automobile”-

GL: “ Say FY, do you ever wonder when you start your car how exactly humans progressed from walking everywhere to driving these marvels of creation?”

FY: “No, I don’t have to wonder, I am pretty familiar with the history of the automobile.”
GL: “You know that technology was given to made by God. Man is simply, but with God great things are possible”

FY: “No, I am pretty sure the technology was slowly developed overtime by man. But if you want to think God did it, that’s fine.”

Miracle 2: “God Makes Rainbows”

GL: “Just look at the gorgeous rainbow God left for us to gaze at.”

FY: “No, that’s what happens when rain and sun mix, but its quite lovely.”

Miracle 3: “God Makes Babies”

GL (about a pregnant coworker): “Wow, Jill sure is glowing with that little treasure God put in her baby.

FY: “GL- please stop the I don’t want to think about how Jill got pregnant, but in any case I don’t think it was god that put anything anywhere.”


But it didn’t stop there. Every time I saw her, it was Jesus Jesus Jesus. He died for me, he loves me, he accepts me as imperfect. Well I got fed up. So any of you out there dealing with your own God Lady…just bitch to HR immediately. These people have no shame, no common sense, and polite attempts to let them know their line of conversation makes you uncomfortable and is inappropriate for the work place.

So, don’t bother. Ring up the HR person and tell them GL is harassing you about Jesus, if its anything like my GL it won’t be the first complaint!

First Year-

(Side note, I have been MIA because Blogger hates me. I have about 4 posts I have tried to put up this week, all rejected by blogger. Boooo)

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

We missed you! (I <3 lurking when there's actually something to read)

3:10 PM  
Blogger josh said...

wow, god knocked up jill. that guy gets around!

it's a great thing i dont work with her. i would send her to "heaven" a little early.

9:26 AM  
Blogger Jed Sorokin-Altmann said...

Well, Henry Ford was antisemetic, so I must say, I find some amusement in GL's example... :P

2:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for reminding me of how lucky I feel to live in godless Sodom Francisco.

10:07 AM  
Blogger honeykbee said...

At one job I had a few years back, the Incredibly Annoying Jesus Lady and the Lady Who Never Shuts Up Nor Goes Away was the same exact person as the Lady Who Can Not Take A Hint When You Are Trying To Get Work Done. It was horrible. There's no escape.

6:40 PM  

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